changed.

one year ago today my life changed forever. in the best way possible.

one year ago today i found out i was pregnant...after 2 long years. what a wonderful blessing! i couldn't have even imaged how my life would change. of course i laid awake at night dreaming of pink and bows and frilly things. but, i couldn't have imaged how much love i would instantly have for someone so small. and how fast she became a vital part of our lives. even before she was born. i felt such gratitude and thankfulness to my heavenly father for giving me the opportunity to carry this little baby. and now for giving me such a sweet and happy baby. she is the center of our lives. our world. we love her more than anything.

you probably never thought i would say this (and neither did i), but i am glad she took her time coming. heavenly father really did know what was best for us. i am so grateful for the time jd and i had as just the two of us. we were able to strengthen our relationship through the good and hard times. we did a lot of traveling and things we wanted to. we really got to know each other better. and believe it was for the best. being parents isn't easy, and i'm so glad we got to know each other better and work so well together.

i know there is a reason that sophie didn't come until it was the right time. i may not know for sure what that reason is, but i like to think i know why. i don't think it was a coincidence that we found out right after jd was accepted to optometry school. i am ashamed to say that we didn't really pray and listen to what we should do about school. we thought we already knew and had our minds made up. when we found out we were having a baby, things got complicated with insurance and finding a new job in texas, etc. we had decided to be apart for a few months in order to protect ourselves financially in case there were problems with the birth or baby. things just weren't working out. jd and i were both unhappy. finally, jd decided not to go to school and stay with sophie and i. we both felt such a sense of relief and felt that was right for our family. i can't believe we were about to move to texas with how little we actually thought about it. i don't think we were supposed to be in texas at the time. sophie came at just the right time to help us make the right decisions for us and to keep us where we needed to be.

i am so lucky to be a mother to my sweet little girl. she couldn't have come at a better time. during those 2 years, i didn't understand the lord's timing and i was angry. why couldn't i just have a baby when i wanted to and when i thought it was best? i am so grateful heavenly father knows better than i and worked things out for the best. i couldn't have asked for a better blessing at a better time. i love my little sophie and i'm so happy to have her here!